Auto shows have never interested me. I wasn’t one of those little boys who played with trucks and I’m not one of those men who tinker with cars and drool over Porsches. And, until recently, I didn’t even know Lexus was made by Toyota. But, now that I own a truck, well, things are different. I know about crossover vehicles and I can recognize the “slammer” influence on new truck designs – thanks to the New York Times auto section, my new favorite piece of the paper.
I convinced a couple of friends to accompany me for after-work cocktails and then a foray into the 2006 Washington Auto Show. I was curious. Cars and trucks by their nature are sexy beasts. Just look at the words associated with them: speed, power, size, muscular, chassis, torque, performance, sensuous, indulgent.
So how could a show featuring 700 cars, trucks, and SUVs be so boring?
First of all, there were very few of the concept cars that had premiered earlier in the month in Detroit. How many Hondas and Hyundais can you really look at? The more interesting cars – like the Bentleys and the retro inspired muscle cars -- were locked and off limits, which sort of defeats the whole premise of a car show. The lighting was bad. The signage was bad. The whole thing reminded me of a big car lot somewhere in the northern Virginia suburbs.
The people for the most part were boring too. Way too many serious straight couples examining hybrids and Acuras. I did notice some gay guys with that new GI Joe look -- short hair, short cropped full beards, and cargo pants -- looking at the small, hip Chevy pickup trucks. But, overall it wasn’t a very gay event. Probably because there were more interesting chassis and bumpers on display just down the street at the Green Lantern where shirtless men drink for free on Thursday night.
Were my expectations just too high? I was imagining big boobed blondes lounging seductively on the hoods of Jaguars and Corvettes while dozens of men ogled them and snapped photos with their cell phones. I expected flashing lights and rotating vehicles. I hoped for the future and all I got was real people looking at real cars. And some Professional Perma-Seal show car wax.
3 comments:
I hate to agree with you. For the most part, the cars look very similar. The new? Chevy HHR is trying so hard to be a PT Cruiser and it's not. The lack of concept cars was a bummer, and what happened to the Saab?
Why would you go to a place where men take their shirts off? Yewww..
Bill, Bill, Bill. You're an artist, so surely you can appreciate the Whitmanesque qualities of a hot room full of half-naked men. Sweat trickling down between muscular pecs. Flexing biceps. Strong broad backs. Fratenity. Liberty. And most importantly, free beer.
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