A Tree-Hugger Forsakes his Volvo for a Big White Pickup Truck

Sometimes an antacid just isn’t enough


A terrible thing happened to me this morning as I was driving from Rehoboth to Washington in my big shiny white pickup truck. The incident occurred on Route 50, just west of Annapolis at 8:05 am. A blonde woman in a black SUV with one of those “W The President” stickers on her back window looked over and smiled at me.

It was more of a smirk, really, and its meaning was clear. She though I was a Republican. I barely managed to keep control the truck in the heavy rush hour traffic. My head was spinning and my stomach was churning. Thought I was gonna vomit up the coffee, hardboiled egg, and tangerine I’d had for breakfast.

A little later on --when my stomach had settled a bit -- I started thinking about trucks and politics. Can you really tell someone’s politics by the car he drives? John Kerry drives a Ford F-150 pickup truck, so reports this month’s Esquire Magazine. George W. Bush keeps a Ford F-250 on his Texas ranch.

Some quick and easy research confirms that you usually can. Volvos are still the most "Democratic" cars, followed by Subarus and Hyundais. But, experts who study these things are quick to point out some changes. New customers in Volvo showrooms no longer fit the old stereotype. Volvos have become more plush and bourgeois, which is a Republican thing. More Democrats than Republicans buy hybrid cars. Foreign-brand compact cars are usually bought by Democrats -- but not Mini Coopers, which are purchased by almost equal numbers of Democrats and Republicans. Experts say nothing is more Republican than a big pickup. They also point out that the top vehicle bought by millionaires is the Ford F-Series pickup truck.

Interesting. I’m a Democrat who used to drive a Volvo. I’m a millionaire (on paper, if house prices in Rehoboth keep on climbing) and I now drive a Ford F-150. Guess I screw up the pollsters. But, then, I’ve always thrived on being a little different. Not radical. Concepts like “average” and “normal” are just plain unappealing to me. And, that’s part of the lure of the truck: it's not what you’d expect a gay treehugger to drive.

Though I enjoy confounding people, I certainly do not want anyone looking at me in my truck and thinking for one moment that I might support George Bush. I will not tolerate being mistaken for a Republican.

There is only one solution to this heartburn -- bumper stickers. But not too many or else they lose their effectiveness...

1 comment:

Boomer Bill said...

Trucks may cut accross party lines
http://www.blogger.com/profile/11927212

You might reconsider your choice.

How about a Hummer?

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